What makes a good parent?
A great parent is a person who strives to make decisions in the most effective interest of the child.
What can make a fantastic parent isn't just defined by the parent 's actions, but additionally their intention.
A great parent doesn't have to be ideal. Nobody is perfect. No kid is ideal either … keeping this in your mind is important when we set the expectations of ours.
Successful parenting isn't about achieving perfection. But it does not mean that we should not work towards that goal. Set very high standards for ourselves first and then the children of ours second. We serve as important role models for them.
Top 10 Parenting Tips
You will be an even better parent, if you follow these 10 tricks for parenting tips, and you will steer clear of bad parenting.
Not all of them tend to be that simple.
Not everybody is able to do them constantly.
Even though some of these might not be 100 % successful, you'll be able to move forward using the tips in this parenting guidebook.
#1 BE A good Role MODEL
Walk the walk. Do not just tell your child everything you wish them to do.
The best way to teach is to show them.
Human is a special species in part because we are able to learn by imitation. We're programmed to imitate others' actions, understand them, and incorporate them into our own. Children, in particular, watch everything their parents do very carefully.
Thus, function as the person you want the child of yours to be - respect your child, demonstrate to them good behavior and attitude, have empathy towards your child's emotion - and your child will follow suit.
#2: Love THEM And Show Through ACTION
Demonstrate the love of yours.
There's no such thing as loving your child too much. Loving them can't spoil them.
Just what you decide to do (or give) in the title of love may - things like material indulgence, leniency, low expectation, and over-protection. When these items are provided in place of love that is real, that's when you'll have a spoiled kid.
To love your child can be as simple as offering them hugs, spending quality time with them, having family meals together, and also listening to your child's problems seriously.
Showing these acts of love is able to cause the release of feel-good hormones such as oxytocin. These neurochemicals are able to provide us a deep feeling of calm, emotional warmth, and contentment; from these, the child, will acquire resilience and never to mention a closer relationship with you.
#3: Practice Kind And Firm POSITIVE PARENTING
Infants are born with around hundred billion brain cells (neurons) with relatively few connections. These connections create our thoughts, drive the actions of ours, shape the personalities of ours, and basically determine who we are. They're "sculpted", strengthened, and created through life experiences.
Give the child of yours positive family interaction, especially in the beginning years. They will then be able to see positive experiences themselves and offer them to others.
But if you give the child of yours negative experiences, they will not have the development type needed for them to thrive.
Sing that silly song. Have a tickle marathon. Go to the park. Laugh with your child. Allow them to have positive attention. Drive with an emotional tantrum with them. Solve an issue together with a positive mind-set.
These positive experiences create excellent neural connections into your child's brain and form the memories of you your child carries for life.
With regards to discipline, it seems difficult to remain positive, particularly when dealing with behavior problems. But it's possible by using positive discipline and avoiding strong discipline.
Being a great parent means you need to teach your child the morals of what's right and what's wrong.
Setting limits and being consistent is the golden rule to discipline that is good. Be kind and firm when you establish rules and implement them. Focus on the reason for the child's misbehavior. And make it an opportunity for them to find out for the future in a positive way, rather than to get penalized for the past.
#4: Be a Safe HAVEN FOR YOUR CHILD
Let your child know that you will always be there for them if it is responsive to your child's signals and sensitive to their needs. Support and accept the child of yours as an individual. Be a warm and safe place for the child of yours to explore from and return to.
Kids raised by parents that are consistently responsive tend to have much better psychological regulation development, interpersonal skills development, and mental health outcomes.
#5: Talk with The CHILD of yours And Help THEIR BRAINS INTEGRATE
Many of us already know the importance of communication. Talk to your child as well as listen to them thoroughly. By maintaining an open line of communication, you will have a better relationship with your child as well as your https://parentinghowto.com/ child will come for you when there is a problem.
But there's another reason behind communication. You help your kid integrate various parts of their brain, a critical process in a child's development.
Integration is akin to the body of ours, in which different organs should coordinate and work in concert to have a trully healthy body. When various regions of the brain are incorporated, they are able to work harmoniously as an entire, which means less tantrums, more good behavior, more empathy, and better psychological well-being.
To accomplish that, conversation through troubling experiences. Ask the child of yours to explain what happened and the way they felt to develop attuned communication.
You don't have to offer solutions. You don't need to have all the answers to be a good parent. Just listening to them talk. Ask clarifying questions using simple words will help them make sense of their experiences and integrate their memories.
#6: Reflect on Your own CHILDHOOD
A lot of us wish to parent differently from our parents. Even people who had an excellent upbringing and a thankful childhood might wish to change some aspects of how they were brought up.
But really frequently, when we open the mouths of ours, we speak the same as the own parents of ours did.
Reflecting on our own childhood is a step towards understanding why we parent the way we do. Make note of things you would like changing and think of how you'd get it done differently in a genuine scenario. Try to be aware and change the behavior of yours next time those issues come up.
Don't give up in case you do not succeed at first. It takes practice, a lot of practice to consciously alter one 's child-rearing methods.
#7: Pay attention to Your own WELL-BEING
Parents require relief also.
Give consideration to your own well being to prevent parental burnout.
Oftentimes, things such as the own needs of yours or maybe the overall health of the marriage of yours are kept on the back burner when a child is born. If you do not take note of them, they are going to become bigger problems down the road. Make time to enhance the relationship of yours with your spouse.
Stressed-out parents are more prone to fighting. Do not hesitate to request parenting assistance. Having some "me time" for self-care and stress management is crucial to rejuvenate the brain.
How parents take care of their child physically and mentally will make an impact in their parenting and family life. In case these two areas fail, your child will suffer, also.
#8: Don't SPANK, NO MATTER WHAT
Undoubtedly, to some parents, spanking can result in short term compliance which sometimes is a much needed relief for the parents.
Nevertheless, this method doesn't teach the child right from wrong. It simply teaches the child to fear outside consequences. The kid is then motivated to stay away from getting caught with inappropriate behavior.
Spanking the child of yours is modeling to your child that he/she is able to resolve issues by violence. A child who is spanked, smacked, or maybe hit is much more prone to fighting with other children. They're more likely in order to become bullies and to use verbal/physical aggression to solve disputes.
Later on in daily life, they're also far more apt to result in oppositional behavior and delinquency, worse parent-child human relationships, mental health issues, and domestic violence victims or even abusers.
There are a variety of more effective options to discipline that have been proven to be much more effective, like good discipline (Tip #3 above ) and positive reinforcement.
#9: Keep Things In Perspective And remember YOUR PARENTING GOAL
What's the goal of yours in raising a child?
If you are like the majority of parents, you want your child to excel in college, be prosperous, be responsible and independent, be respectful, enjoy positive associations with you and others, be to care and compassionate, plus have a happy, healthy and fulfilling life.
Though just how much time do you spend working towards those goals?
When you are like most parents, you probably spend most of the time just trying to get through the day. As authors, Bryson and Siegel, point out in their book, The Whole-Brain child, rather than helping your child thrive, you spend most of time just trying to survive!
To not let the survival mode dominate your life, the next time you're feeling frustrated or angry, step back. Consider what frustration and anger will do for you or your child.
Instead, find ways to turn each bad experience right into a learning opportunity for them. Even epic tantrums could be turned into priceless brain sculpting moments in case you focus on teaching your child, not trying to control them.
#10: Take a SHORTCUT By utilizing Findings In Latest PSYCHOLOGY And NEUROSCIENCE RESEARCH
By shortcuts, I do not mean shortchanging the child of yours with tricks. What I mean is taking advantage of what's already known by scientists.
Parenting is one of the most researched fields in psychology. Lots of parenting strategies, traditions, or practices have been scientifically researched, verified, refined, or refuted.
For best parenting advice for increasing a kid and information that are backed by science, here's among my favorite science based parenting guides, The Science of Parenting.
Using scientific knowledge is of course not really a one-size-fits-all approach. Every child differs. Quite possibly within the very best parenting style, there can be many different good parenting methods you can choose based on your child's temperament.
A good example is using spanking to discipline. You will find many better alternatives, e.g. redirection, reasoning, time-in, etc. You are able to choose a non punitive discipline method that works best for your child.
Naturally, you are able to also decide to utilize "traditional" or "old school" parenting styles (e.g. punishing or spanking) and also might still get a "similar" outcome.
Differential susceptibility has found us that children with different temperaments respond to the quality of parenting differently.
Those who are more susceptible to parenting quality is going to have better outcomes under great parenting but worse outcomes under poor parenting.
Those people who are less prone may "turn out fine" no matter how strong their parents treat them. But it does not imply those practices are good. These children are merely lucky. They could thrive despite bad parenting, not due to it.
Why take a chance with sub par parenting practices if you can use well-researched, better ones?
The importance of parenting can't be underestimated. Taking science-based parental advice might not be the easiest way to parent. It might require more work on the part of yours in the short term but can help you save lots of time and agony in the long term.
Final Thoughts On Parenting
The good thing is, that although parenting is hard, it is additionally very rewarding. The bad part will be the rewards usually come much later than the hard work. But if we try our best today, we will ultimately reap the rewards and have nothing to regret.
To Happy Parenting!